Here’s a secret: Women Love Nice Guys! I bet you’ve probably never heard that one before. Or maybe you have, from your grandmother or great aunt! But you probably never believed it. Instead, you probably believed what most people do: That women love bad guys.
Well, it’s not true. Women do in fact love nice guys, but they love the right type of nice guys, not just any-old, run-of-the-mill nice guy, but a specific type of nice guy. And that’s what you want to be, a very specific, and very precise kind of nice. For if you are not, and you sway from this exact guy even a little bit, it can completely backfire!
Why Women Don’t Like Jerks
Let’s first talk about why women don’t actually like jerks. Sure jerks or bad boys are exciting and they have certain qualities which can be very enticing to women (they can be confident, outgoing, funny, mysterious, and dominant, among other things). Women tend to love these certain qualities, as they often signal an alpha male personality, the type of personality women love the most.
Most bad boys or jerks however often come equipped with the flip-side to all of these attractive traits. And this is what turns women off. For every confident bad boy there is a side that gets cocky. For every outgoing jerk there is a side that gets obnoxious. For every funny bad boy there is a side that gets offensive. For every mysterious jerk there is a side that gets aloof. And for every dominant bad boy, there is a side that gets controlling. All of these characteristics are things that kill attraction and shape the woman into eventually loathing these bad boys and these jerks.
Although attraction may be present initially, because of the qualities these bad boys and jerks possess at times, it ultimately flounders once the entire personality (all of the negative traits which make these bad boys and jerks who they are) shines through. Women eventually get sick of being with these guys and most of them make the right decision and move on.
Being Too Nice = Needy
I like to call myself an optimist in life. I truly believe that 99% of people are good. Meaning that only a small amount of our population is innately bad. So trying to be bad in an effort to attract women is just an act that some guys play. These guys instead should focus on being what they really are, and that is genuinely nice.
By being genuinely nice, the right kind of nice that is, as we’ll talk about shortly, you can take advantage of the fact that women prefer these types of guys anyways. No woman wants to truly be with an a**hole.
But there is a fine line that you must walk when choosing to be nice. And that is the nice to needy line. If you haven’t read my article about being needy, please check it out now and come back. If you have, you know all of the ways you can display neediness to women and why this completely turns women off! So you must make sure that when you decide to be nice (Which is what I am telling you to do here!), you stay clear of being needy!
This is hard for needy and naturally co-depend guys to understand at first. However it is a must for ensuring your success with women. You do not want to be too nice, I mean nice to the point where you sacrifice who you are and what you truly feel like doing, especially right when you meet a woman! This is crossing the line. This is where a lot of guys get it wrong. By actually being overly nice, you are being fake and women can sense right through this. This is where the neediness comes in. You are being needy by being too nice and pretending to care because you need a woman to like you.
Instead of making her feel special, which is what you are consciously trying to do, you do the opposite. You make her feel like she is replaceable, because you don’t know her and because you probably do this with every woman you just meet and you don’t really know!
So stop it!
Stand Your Ground (A Man’s Law)
You can still be a genuinely nice but in control of what’s going on. Being nice doesn’t mean giving into and rolling over for everything a woman wants. As a matter of fact, I will go so far as to say, you must have strong character whilst being a nice guy in order to be successful with women.
If you do not have a strong mindset, again, you risk going over the edge and becoming needy. Nice guys who do great with women often still have a great, unwavering respect for their beliefs and their ideals. They often are confident, straight-forward, charismatic, opinionated, funny, edgy, outgoing and over-the-top at times, and much more. In fact they can wear many different hats in many different situations. But at the end of the day, they are who they are, good guys. The only difference between these nice guys (the guys who succeed with women) and other nice guys, is that they don’t change who they are at the very core of their fabric for anyone, no matter how pretty or beautiful they may appear.
Putting It All Together
You want to be nice when looking to meet women; just make sure it’s the right type of nice. Being too nice risks being needy, and this is not where you want to be. You want to keep your beliefs and do not change the essence of who you are for anyone in life. That means being your best and most honest self at all times. Women love nice guys and they always will. By being nice and still keeping your attractive qualities, you can succeed with any woman you meet!
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