Coaching men in how to meet quality women is my job. I love giving guys the tools to go out and make real connections with women. I love when I see guys attracting women and dating women. And most importantly I love seeing guys find love with women. It is a true blessing that I get to do this professionally and make a real difference in people’s lives. I wouldn’t change my job right now for anything else in the world. Simply put, I love what I do.
One of the main things I do when a client signs up for coaching is to actually start going out and having that client approach women. After discussing my philosophy and approach with the client, I get them socially warmed up for a bit. Then I ease them into approaching women, and actually talking to women they find attractive. It’s much easier to approach women whom they don’t really consider to be attractive. But when they start seeing women that they think are beautiful, I push them into “going for it.”
On the flipside, some guys will not approach any woman, unless she is “drop-dead gorgeous” as they’ll say. They only want the most physically attractive girls, and will not talk to any other woman that doesn’t fit this criterion. And you know what happens? They spend the whole day doing nothing, because there really aren’t too many physically flawless women walking around. And even if there was, these guys always find an excuse, and would make up an imperfection, just so they could convince themselves not to approach her. It’s so frustrating. After all there is no difference between one woman a man finds physically attractive, and another woman he doesn’t find attractive. They are both women he doesn’t know. The “beautiful” woman might have an awful personality, and the less attractive woman might completely click with my client. But my client will never find out unless he “goes for it.”
So I try to explain this concept to guys whenever possible. All women are created equal. Even the absolutely stunning, beautiful, and most attractive ones. Some guys will think that the more beautiful a woman is, the more value she will have. It’s almost like they won’t approach a woman they really, really like, because she is too attractive for him. But they will approach a woman that they just sort of like, because they feel she has less value or value that is closer to his own perceived value of himself. And the other guys won’t approach an attractive woman because she is not completely flawless physically, and they consider her to have less value, and so will pass her up as well. It’s such an awful way to find love. They pass up 99% of women, because of their superficial views about looks. These two problems seem completely opposite, but they are actually one in the same. You see, what is happening is both these men are putting way too much value on the way a woman looks. They either give her too much value because of her looks, or too little value because of her looks. When in fact her looks should have very little to do with her value at all.
I’m with a friend the other day teaching him about approaching women. He sees a woman, and looks at me and says “Oh my god, she is absolutely gorgeous,” and I agreed, she was very attractive. But then I noticed he wasn’t approaching this woman, just watching her walk away. I asked him why he wasn’t going. He said “Oh I can’t talk to her, she’s a 10.” “All women are created equal!” I yelled at him. And then I told him about this concept in detail. The rest of the day, he approached every single woman he saw, no matter what they looked like! He either learned what I just discussed, or didn’t want to have to listen to a lecture about it again! Either way, I was able to get this message across to him, and I truly think he is going to start following it.
Physical beauty does not define who a woman is. A woman is attractive because of so many other things other than just beauty. Her personality, her outlook, her style, her confidence, and the way she carries herself, etc. all define her “beauty.” These things define it much more than the shape of her body ever could. If she has a great body, or a pretty face that’s awesome, but it is just a small piece of the puzzle. Do not limit yourself when meeting women to only talking to the most attractive women. On the flipside, do not settle for less, when you are approaching, because you think a woman is too attractive for you. She has looks, and looks are great, but you won’t find out about the rest of her “beauty,” unless you talk to her.